of the most important things you can do. Never question a person’s
actions, details of the assault or why they feel the way they do.
Help them explore their options - Empower them! Let them know
they are not alone and remind them of available resources (campus
counselor, campus or community rape crisis center, women’s center,
hospital, police department, etc). It is always up to the survivor to
make choices that will affect their healing process.
Listen to them - Offer your support and time. Let them know they
can talk to you about their experience when they are ready.
Never blame them - Say clearly and with care, “It was not your
fault.” It is important that you help them understand that no matter
what happened, it was not their fault.
Allow them to react - Remember, there are many ways for a survivor
to respond. It is important not to ask a lot of probing questions.
Your presence can reassure the survivor and allow them to work out
their feelings in a safe environment.
• What do you want to do?
• How do you feel about that?
• Do you want to?
• What would you like?
• What is the best thing that could happen?
• What is the worst thing that could happen?
Phrases to Avoid:
• Analyzing, interpreting: you’re doing that because…
• Dominating or interrupting conversation
• Warning or instructing: If you don’t ____, you will regret it.
• Questioning or grilling: When did it happen,
where did it happen, why did you do that?
• Offering solutions: I think you should____.
• Providing overly positive evaluations: I’m sure you will be fine.
Learn more and get other great tips at http://www.uniteforchange.com/